(as a note to any new readers: I like to post a note occasionally called "Right Now". In these posts, I talk about what is happening around me, in my mind and my heart, right now.)
- I have an ice pack on each knee. It feels lovely.
- Geoff is making his way out the door. He wants to shoot pictures in the late, late hours of the night. He is a night owl. He is at his best and completely motivated after 11pm at night. I unfortunately, am not. I am a morning person. It has made the last 14 years of marriage frustrating and interesting.
- I can hear the filter on our new pool running. The kids are thrilled with it. Sebastian views it as a big bathtub and sometimes asks for bubbles. Sawyer can't wait to be able to swim alone. I love that they will get to have the experience of swimming their summer away, of getting sunburns on their noses and shoulders, of having pruny fingers and toes.
- Axle is panting in the heat. He is stretched out on the bed, sleepy and relaxed. But he's hot. I bring him into the bathroom occasionally and rub water into his fur. I tried to bring him outside and let him lay in his pool, but he's not interested. He wants to sleep. With me, in my room.
- I am enjoying the dripping water from my hair, as it runs down my back.
- I am watching Criminal Minds. My mom lent me the DVDs for Season 3 and Season 4. It took me a bit to get into it, but now, I think I am hooked. It's creepy and disturbing, but has some cool characters. Geoff and I are trying to clean up and actually watch some of the shows and movies that we have borrowed from other people. There is a stack a mile high, just waiting for me to get through it.
- I am resisting the urge to eat popcorn. And drink Diet Pepsi. And eat cookies. I am winning.
- My babies are sleeping. I have checked on both of them, and they are a little sweaty but good. Sawyer has lost her pjs at some point. Sebastian is still wrapped in his blankets, coccooned and comforted. The fans are running, moving the air, keeping them cool. I worry about them in the heat, but they are fine. Their minds are at rest, their bodies are recharging and growing. I can feel their presence as surely as if they were in the room with me. And it puts me at rest. At peace.
- I am starting my overtime. I have more work than I have time for. I need the money. I am still struggling with the doing, even though there are so many reasons why I should.
- There is an almost full moon in the sky. There are leaves, rustling in a summer breeze. There are small, night things moving in my backyard.
- Right now, I am happy.
Rosie N. Grey
The N stands for "now".