Shit that stresses me out

I learned in a health and wellness seminar at work this week that I have what is called "chronic" stress.  That is to say that my stressed state outweighs my relaxed state and that I am not allowing myself to relax and rejuvenate after a stressful time.  Basically, I feel so much stress that I don't know what it is like to not feel stress.  I really don't.  I don't remember a time that I wasn't stressed.  So, per the advice I received, I am delving deep into my soul and sharing with all of you- the shit that stresses me out.  Anything crossed off has been taken care of.

1. Accounting course and final 3-hour exam.  DONE!  Wrote (and bombed) the exam last Saturday!
2. Sebastian's dental surgery.  DONE!  After a month long delay, finally got the surgery done and done.  Aside from some disorientation and the subsequent violence, some bleeding and grumpiness, the kid came it with flying colours.
     2a. Sebastian's heart murmur.  Yep.  This anesthetist heard it too.  Shit.
3. Money.  This never leaves.  Until I win a hundred million dollars in the lottery, this will always be on the list.  But it isn't super high.  All good.
4. Sawyer's speech.  Again, coming along.  She is talking much better, and even though she isn't quite where she should be, she is doing great and making strides.  Superstar.
5. Running.  Still doing it.  Moved from week 3 to week 4 finally, after repeating week 3 three times, because I was afraid of what would happen in week 4.  I am a fraidy cat.
6. Having a functional and working website for Cracked Lens.  I want to make money at something I love and this would go a long way to helping that.  But I am seeing some good things coming with this, thanks to Kevin, so I am getting excited about this.
7. Christmas presents.  I just want everyone to love what they get, and to have a good Christmas.  'Nuff said.
8. The current cleanliness of my house.  This is a big one.  I don't know when this will get better.  This causes me more stress than is probably healthy.  I can actually feel my blood pressure rise when I walk into the house and it is messy.  I hate cleaning and then coming home to a pig sty.  I hate that my feet crunch when I walk across the carpet, and stick to the kitchen floor.  I hate seeing dog hair in the corners.  Stress, stress, stresssssssssssss.....
9. Geoff's current state of employment ( or lack thereof).  DONE!  Geoff is now gainfully employed.
     9a. Babysitting situation.
     9b. How will Sebastian get on the bus everyday?
     9c. What will his schedule be like?
     9d. Will this be good for him, meaning Geoff?
     9e. How will this impact the photography?
     9f. Will Axle be lonely through the day, or can we get a sitter for him?
10. Sebastian's therapy.  I want to get private therapy for Sebastian.  He is capable of so much more, I think, and neither I or Geoff know how to bring it out of him.  I think this therapy would help.  It also costs $2000 a month.  *sigh*  How do I make that work?
11.  Sawyer's potty training.  I asked Geoff to train her in the summer.  I asked again in September.  I mention it on a weekly basis.  Yep, that's right.  It's not done.  Not even started.  *sigh heavily*
12. The house.  I love my house, but I HATE it too.  I hate the rooms I haven't touched.  I hate the clutter that seems to build on its own on every open surface.  I hate the old lady decorating, and the crappy floors and everything that is ugly and not mine.  I hate the crappy flowerbeds, and the weedy lawn, and the too-small side porch, and the cracks in the foundation.  I hate the old windows, the old furnace and the non-existent air conditioner.  And I hate that I never seem to have the money, or the time to fix it. 

Ok, that's all for now.  That's enough.  Next post- Things that depress me.  #1- this list.

Rosie N. Grey
The N stands for "next on the list...."