"Change, when it comes, cracks everything open."
Dorothy Allen

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Back to School

First day of school, 2011
Sebastian's first day back to school seems to go well.  He was pretty anti-school this morning, and really didn't  want to go. We let him have some computer time, and he had a good breakfast.  By the time he was done brushing his teeth, he was in a better frame of mind, and happily went out to meet his bus.

Every year, we take a picture on the front porch for the first day of school.  Even though it was raining today, we kept up the tradition.  Sawyer joined in, and we got smiles out of both of them.

Totem pole of love

My dad came over to see him off, also a tradition.  It was rainy, that misty kind of rain that just soaks into everything and chills you to the bone. We all bundled up against it.

Sebastian and Sawyer had races up and down the side walk (Sawyer ran, Sebastian limped along. He is still recovering from the cast.)  Sawyer was remembering being out, across the street, waiting for the bus. She was enjoying herself.

The bus was running late, and didn't end up picking Sebastian up until about quarter to nine.  I missed him actually getting on the bus, because Sawyer and I had to pee.  She made it back out in time and I didn't.

I felt a little weepy, earlier in the morning.  It is always so hard to send him out into the world.  I worry so much about him, but I really try not to let him know that. He doesn't need any more anxiety than he already harbours.  But when it was time for him to leave, I held it together and was very brave.

Geoff, Sawyer and I came back in and snuggled for a bit and watched some TV.  We did have some running around to do, so we went out about noon.

I think I was feeling anxious, because I was a bit irritable. I didn't realize it at the time, but looking back, I can see it.  We picked up prescriptions, and got some groceries.  Each year, on the first day of school, we would take Sebastian out for dinner.  That isn't possible this year, so we asked what he wanted to have for dinner.  He chose hamburgers (beef is a treat for him), chicken fingers (coatings are a treat for him) and french fries. The kid's a gourmet, for sure.

We stopped and picked up food and browsed kids clothing.  There were some amazingly cute clothes.  Sawyer, of course was fascinated with the boots. What a girl.

We headed home, and I cut and seeded the lawn.  Sebastian made it home in good time.  The true test of a day is how he is when he comes off the bus.  When the bus pulls up, and he is smiling, that means a good day.  90% of the time he is smiling.  7% of the time he is sleeping.  We won't talk about the other 3%.

Sebastian was smiling.

He said (and his book supported it) that he had a good day.  He came in, and we talked a bit about school. He was allowed to play on the computer for one hour.  For the first time, I decided to set the timer.  We talked about the timer and what it means when it goes off.  An unexpected side effect of this, was that it took alot of stress off me.  I didn't feel like I had to watch the clock and make sure that he was not on for too long.  It gave me a chance to read my magazine, and start dinner. Once the timer went off, Sebastian knew and logged off pretty quickly.

After that, he did something that shocked me.  He asked to go outside to play.

Now, Sebastian has inherited his love of the outdoors from his father.  That is to say, he has no love of the outdoors.  Really, none.

So, it is usually not an easy thing to get him to go outside and play.  He very, VERY rarely asks to go out.  So, this was kind of a big deal.  I told him that yes, he could go out and...another first....he could go out by himself. 

Yes, I will admit it, I am over-protective. I think I am justified in that.  I don't let my kids play outside without an adult with them.  I envision pedophiles climbing over the backfence and stealing them away forever.  I picture him falling and smashing his head.  I imagine kids standing at the fence, screaming cruelties and throwing rocks.  I know, I know, I am ridiculous.  I know this about me, but there it is.

But, he is going to be 10.  He is growing up, and I need to let him.  So, I put on my big girl pants, swallowed my fear, and let him go out to play.  He did great. I had to yell at one point, because he is was putting his sister's fairy garden toys in the dog's pool. After that, he headed for the trampoline.

Shortly after that, Sawyer woke from her nap and headed out too.  Geoff followed along. 

I let the hamburgers burn a bit, because I was loving the moment.  From a day that started in drizzle and almost-tears, we had sunshine, breezes and laughing kids.  The air was cool, and smells like October.  It made my heart happy.  The air itself was inspiring. The kids wrestled and ran and laughed.  Geoff was laughing and had shed his mantle of stress, at least for a while. It was wonderful and magic. 

The mood carriedover into dinner. Everyone enjoyed Sebastian's specially selected meal.  Sawyer ate well, and didn't fight.  Sebastian did too.  We took a short drive after dinner, Geoff tidied the kitchen while I gave the kids their baths.  We got into pjs and watched Rio, then to bed. 

It was a frigging awesome day.  What a way to start a new school year.  This is great karma, and I am so thankful for it.
the best things in my world
Rosie N. Grey
The N stands for nearly perfect.

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